Chapter Fourteen

THE INN

And the heat of the sun had made them weary from their labours, and as dry as a Pommy’s towel, and in sore need of refreshment. So Matthew led his flock unto an inn; and there was great merriment to be heard from within the inn, without.

Which means what was within the inn could be heard without.

Without being within.

And they entered through the doorway of that place and beheld a gathering of the most dreadful iniquity, and they averted their eyes from the happenings, for this was, surely, a sinful place. For a multitude of unkempt labourers had gathered within; and they held crystal chalices unto their lips; and the chalices were filled to the brims with a foaming nectar of the clearest amber which the labourers did imbibe at swift pace and in great amounts; yea, as though it were in danger of going out of fashion.

And the merry labourers beheld the weary travellers as they entered therein, and they cried out in one voice: "Lo! Behold the buggered travellers, for surely have they come to join us in our festivities!" And the labourers greeted the travellers in customary manner, and placed a hairy arm about the shoulders of each one, and spoke loudly thus: "Here y’are mate, get yer giggling gear round some grog!" And others said: "Have a frosty bleedin’ tube y’old bastard, what d’ya think of good old Oz so far?"

And with the language of love being universal, the labourers were caused to be embraced unto the bosom of the multitude, yea, whether they liked it or not; and, as a bird hasteth to the snare unknowing, they were caused, also, to enter unto the lewdness of that place. And at the bidding of the labourers they partook of the frosty tubes, and they sated themselves on large amounts of bloody good tucker.

And the merriment continued in this wise for a sore age until the travellers, too, commenced to sing and to fall unto the ground upon their countenances; and many had cause to visit the big white telephone, there to bring forward the technicolor yawns and the liquid laughs, for verily, as Matthew could not help but notice, they were all as full as a bull’s bum.

And upon that day the travellers did discover that the amber brew it biteth like a serpent and stingeth like a scorpion, although at the time it slideth down like a treacle sandwich.

Then Matthew beheld the travellers as he ceased his idle tattle with the tavern wench, and he saw that they erred in vision and stumbled in judgment through strong drink, and he was ashamed; and he said unto the tavern wench: "Just my luck to get lumbered with a bunch of two-pot screamers". But there was no counsel he could give them – them that are weaned from the milk and drawn from the breast; for they were old enough to look after themselves, and if they wanted to end up honking the bacon down the pipes, then that was their lookout.

So, as the dusk descended, the revelry continued; and everyone within that place became swallowed up of wine and out of the way through strong drink; and the place ended up in total chaos; and there was all manner of filthiness, so that there was no place clean.

But this was known as having a ripper of a night out; and not one amongst the travellers was the slightest bit concerned about how he would feel upon the morrow.

Chapter 15 - The Wilderness